The Problem with Please and Thank You…

Soooooo....the problem with Please and Thank You is…there is no problem with them!  The problem is YOU!  Okay maybe not you, per se…but it’s the spoiled, the rotten, the selfish, the “too comfortable”, and the elitist. Yup…I said it!  The ELITIST…those who are so used to getting what they want that they forget who, what, when, where, and why they received the blessings in the 1st place.

All uh dem!

For some reason people forgot their manners and decided that, pleasantries are no longer required in business and personal life.  But Please doesn’t suffer as much as Thank you though!  Oh no!  Thank you is almost taboo, non-existent, a “Lockness Monster” or “Bigfoot” that you hear about and read about but only comes out when no witnesses are around.

Now some may say that when it comes to business, the check should be Thank you enough…touché!  However, we don’t always receive monetary compensation when conducting business.  Sometimes we are networking, connecting dots, forwarding helpful articles, bartering, giving advice, or congratulating someone on a job well done.

Guess what’s supposed to come next?  Thank you!  It’s bad enough we rely on smart phones and social media…but do we have to lose common courtesies too?

You mean to tell me that the newest and trendiest thing out right now is to take without acknowledgement?  Receive without appreciating?  Benefit without giving back?  Accept without saying a motherfucking THANK YOU?

So what if we nice people decided to flip it?  A wise person told me TUH DAY, “as soon as a person stops thanking you…that’s when you stop. “  What do you think?  Is this good advice?  But I don’t want to change who I am because you don’t have manners…you feel me?  And as a person who gives and gives and sometimes doesn’t receive the same type of efforts, encouragement, hook-ups, or niceness in return, AT MINIMUM, I'd appreciate and expect a Thank You. 

Yes, you read correctly…I used the word, EXPECT.  People say that you should give without expecting anything but I call, bullshit!  We should definitely give because we want to, because we can and/or out of the kindness of our hearts…but I don’t know many or anyone who wouldn’t want to be acknowledged or thanked.  Now of course I’m not talking the about the Saints who live among us and the good anonymous Samaritans who do good things and vanish without a trace.  I am talking about the average person…those who we communicate with, work with, talk to, like, and love.

You’re making it harrrrrrrrrrd on us who want to do good things because we want to do good things!  And I don’t know if it’s because you’re living in a bubble, too busy or too oblivious to realize it.  But, without a simple thanks, you suck the positive energy out of that gesture that was made just for you. You also can make a person feel like your undeserving of said gesture and any future ones that may have had your name on them.

So listen here!  Next time someone does something nice for you, says something nice to you, or because of you…say, Thank you.  

It should roll off your tongue with ease.  Think of it as dessert after a well-cooked meal or that unexpected check you received after doing a good job.  You thank God, you thank your credit card for working when you get to the register after you've OD'd at Target…you even thank Hollywood writers you’ve never met after something good comes on your TV! So go ahead…thank your friend for that advice, your co-worker for picking up your slack, that person who complimented you on your outfit of the day, your Follower for leaving a comment on your blog,  your homie who just wanted to check on you, your family for putting up with you, your colleague for those tickets, that associate for the referral, and him or her for being that shoulder to cry on or ear to vent to when things may not go your way.  Don’t forget those you pray for you and the ones who cheer for you.

Thank them.  Now thank me.

...and Thanks for reading.

CMJ